Late Cancer Show

Yesterday night I deliberately watched David Letterman because I knew Michael Douglas was there. He discussed his throat cancer and the severity of his conditions. Yet, he seemed so strong and determined to fight cancer that he looked like a teenager eager to taste life. I've just read an article on La Repubblica - my favourite Italian newspaper. I'm old fashioned: I don't read online newspapers, I still turn pages and I read  while I'm sipping my morning coffee. I will never give up this early morning pleasure- written by the well known Italian oncologist Umberto Veronesi. He claims that there has been a significant shift: cancer is not a taboo anymore and the fact that Michael Douglas made a public appearance and talked opening about his battle is very important. It may have an impact on both patients and society: he has cancer, he speaks about it and he seems a warrior enganged in a challenging but not impossible to win battle. According to Veronesi, this is a cultural revolution. I partially agree with him. We (Italians) are not there yet as there is a sort of "general embarassment" even if I'm not sure this is the right way to put it.  We tend to be more reticent to speak out and I can't imagine an Italian actor being so open about his illness after the first week of treatment. I wish we were so open but I'm afraid it will take us time to adjust to this important social and cultural revolution.

The Queen of Paris

We love you Francesca! :)

My favourite boot

Big boy is looking out the window. He is a bit scared, he hears a distant noise of thunders. Sometimes I hear the sound of my thoughts and when they are too loud or confused, I turn off the brain and try to relax. I'm done with my job for today. I have everything I need: my notes, a logical path to follow, two interesting books. I'm wondering if these contemporary Italian authors have been translated in English. Probably no and it's a shame. As I mentioned, Italian culture is still very rich in terms of authors, cinema and music and I don't understand why so many people don't realize this simple fact. Italy is corrupted but by no means is "ignorant" (well, Berlusconi's supporters are ignorant and it seems they are the majority of the country but I'm thinking about my country as a per se entity with emotions, soul and history). Italy is brillant and creative. She -Italy must be a woman, I'm sure- lives at the Empire's perimeters: influenced by American culture (the "empire") and shaped by European ways of thinking but always amazingly provincial. Her strenght is being provincial, I like it because within her long, narrow and boot shaped body there is a whole variety of dialects, food, accents, wines, ruines, local peculiarties which made me love her to death. I fell in love with this boot when I was a kid. Listening to my grandparents' dialect, eating focaccia in Tuscany and polenta in Piedmont, reading Dante, Leopardi, Manzoni, watching Mastroianni and Sofia Loren. The boot is not big but there are lots of things in it. Growing up in such a chaos of dialects, accents, expressions, surrounded by art and beauty, nourished by her delicious gifts (fresh vegetables and fruits) is wonderful. Oh yes, this boot fits me well. I couldn't wear another one despite the fact that looks very old and sometimes I would like to live in a brand new "boot". I can't help it: I like vintage.

ps. By the way, this is post #100.

Why am I disgusted?

Because we are increasingly ruled by the Vatican and I don't like it at all. As I mentioned, I'm spirtual but I would like to live in a country where the words autodetermination and freedom of choice still make sense.

Disillusionment

Simply put: I AM DISGUSTED.

Made in Chinatown

Very interesting documentary (English version) about the Chinese community in Milan.

Despite the fact we see migrants or non native communities in our cities, we often pretend they are "invisible". The have a sort of invisible aura that make them non relevant to our lives. Chinese are relevant only when they cause troubles, otherwise they are like small ghosts who own restaurants, shops and sometimes exploit women who are exploited both by their own community and by Italians (i.e. Chinese massages centres).

I've become interested in those "silent identities" lately and I do think they deserve our attention and all our efforts to develop a truly multicultural society. The myth of race (such as the razza padana) recalls fascism and we are several decades after the dictatorship. We are not better or worse than anyone else, we simply need to time to adjust to a different Italian society which, I think, would be much more vital and culturally rich if only we would be more prone to share our space with other people.

A touch deprived society?

Sometimes I feel the urge to hug and kiss my colleagues but I refrain from showing affection. There is a sort of unwritten rule or etiquette: if love is not involved it’s better to avoid physical contact, especially at the work place. Cheek kissing is fine, it’s our greeting habit but I would hug them more if it wasn’t considered inappropriate which I don’t think it is even in professional settings. We all are approximately the same age and we are not sexually interested in each other but still there are physical boundaries that I don’t fully understand. 

Don’t get me wrong, it’s important to establish physical boundaries in relationships and I don’t necessarily want to be touched and hugged all the time. However, I think that my country is increasingly becoming a touch deprived society and I’m wondering what has led us to this. I’m aware this could be seen as a rough generalization but I think that “showing affection” has become so sexualized that even very warm people like Italians refrain from conveying warmth.  It is sad though because it would be much easier to be open and clear instead of avoiding contact because it may be not appropriate.

Through the sexual objectification of women in Italy and elsewhere friendliness is sometimes seen as an interest that goes far beyond friendship. “I don’t hug because I’m not sexually interested in you” is, I think, a common approach. However, physical manifestations of empathy are very important to reduce stress for instance and chimps know it better us. 

Body contact is so sexualized that we tend to avoid it and I miss it! I would feel more comfortable if I could hug my male colleagues more often instead of thinking that I shouldn’t because I don’t want to sleep with them.